Today is the 19th going to 20th soon , 8 more days to my pay again ! yeah ! And end of May ! I love June because is school holiday for my boyfriend and we won't be wearing those sickening uniform already! Regaining our original uniform . So cool! Recently quite busy with work and my studies.Next month end starting of my exam already. Hope can pass man. Recently so many quarrels with mother and boyfriend.
I don't know why also. Yesterday after quarrel i just went to sleep after he walked out of the house. I didnt even chased after him. What's happening to me ? Today just got into a big quarrel with mother over a stupid small matter at hougang mall. WTF ? Why is this happening to me ? Seriously i really hope that my own mother
sometime can be understanding, but that will never happen i guess. The good news is she told me that she had found a job and i am quite happy about that, at least she have something to do. And cut me off some slack. phew..
Talk about my boyfriend, we are going to our 8th month already i think about 2 weeks more. Recently, I just
felt that me and him felt like stranger to each other. No longer that close anymore. Wondering what's happening. Does he still love me as much as before ? And today just keep asking me to change my style of wearing. Is he trying to hint that i shouldnt wear so childish or immature already ? Is he started to despise me already ? I am wondering alot of things, i do not know what is he thinking anymore. I am afraid of losing him. But is he afraid of losing me too ? Is he still feeling the same way towards me like before ? There is so many doubts about him. Maybe we both had a hectic lifestyle so talked less to each other too. And i had so many stress too. Stress about my own future , my studies and everything. I felt so lonely deep down in my heart .
Does anyone knows that ?
Talk about myself, i don't even know recently what i am doing. I just feel so lost and feel so fail. Nobody listen
to me. Forever is my fault. Like nothing is correct. I swear i will study hard to get that fcuking O level cert and at least further my studies to get a much high pay job. I am also wondering will i last with him ? Will he get tired of me ? Will he find me a nuisance sooner or later ? There is so many doubts and i don't feel like thinking abut it . All i want is to be happy . That's all.
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